Bayern Munich picked up where they left off last season by setting a Bundesliga opening-day record with a 8-0 win over Schalke.
Bayern needed just three minutes to take the lead, with Serge Gnabry firing home from the edge of the box, and Robert Lewandowski nearly made it two just seconds later. Bayern actually had to wait another 15 minutes for the second, which came through Leon Goretzka’s low drive. Lewandowski made it three from the penalty spot after 30 minutes, but Schalke managed to avoid further punishment before half time.
The wait for goals in the second half was even shorter, with Gnabry taking just over one minute to finish off a counter attack, and he bagged his hat-trick shortly before the hour mark. Thomas Müller bagged the sixth, Leroy Sané netted the seventh and Jamal Musiala added the eighth before the referee skipped the injury time and put Schalke out of their misery.
Manuel Neuer (GK) – 6/10 – Celebrated his 250th Bundesliga appearance by doing pretty much nothing all evening.
Benjamin Pavard (RB) – 6/10 – Looked a little out of practice but could usually be seen bombing down the right wing.
Jérôme Boateng (CB) – 8/10 – Didn’t have much to do but looked confident in possession and was almost flawless on the ball. Had blue hair.
Niklas Süle (CB) – 8/10 – On the odd occasion Schalke came forward, Süle was there to put out the fire before it was even lit.
Lucas Hernández (LB) – 7/10 – Replacing Alphonso Davies was never going to be easy, but Lucas rose to the challenge admirably. Got forward a lot but lacked Davies’ cutting edge.
Joshua Kimmich (CM) – 9/10 – Wearing Thiago’s number 6, Kimmich was outstanding as Bayern’s conductor. His pass for Gnabry’s opener was sublime.
Leon Goretzka (CM) – 8/10 – Took his goal against his former side well and was his typically dominant self at both ends of the field.
Serge Gnabry (RM) – 9/10 – Gnabry was everywhere for Bayern. He was happy to stay out wide but was constantly drifting inside to offer an alternative to Lewandowski, and that’s how he took his goal.
Thomas Müller (AM) – 8/10 – Carried on where he left off with another assist and added a goal for good measure. Continued to pull the strings and ensured Thiago’s absence was not felt.
Leroy Sané (LM) – 9/10 – Just the two assists and one goal on his debut, and he probably should have had a few more goals of his own, but often looked a little trigger-shy.
Robert Lewandowski (ST) – 8/10 – After missing out on the 2020 Ballon d’Or, Lewandowski looks like he wants to right that wrong in 2021. Bagged one goal and could have had three or four more. Pulled out a lovely rabona assist for Müller.
Corentin Tolisso – 6/10
Michaël Cuisance – 6/10
Chris Richards – 6/10
Jamal Musiala – 7/10
Ralf Fährmann (GK) – 5/10 – Was busy all night long and ensured Bayern didn’t hit 15 or 16 (that’s not an exaggeration).
Sebastian Rudy (RB) – 1/10 – Isn’t a right-back and played like he isn’t a right-back. Was embarrassingly shrugged off by Sané for Bayern’s fourth goal. Rough day.
Benjamin Stambouli (CB) – 3/10 – Combined a handful of impressive blocks with plenty of mind-boggling decisions. Stopped a certain goal from Lewandowski but was comically left behind by Sané for Bayern’s fourth.
Ozan Kabak (CB) – 5/10 – Sloppy to give away the penalty but was otherwise fairly composed. Made a few impressive bursts forward. Easily Schalke’s top performer (without much competition).
Bastian Oczipka (LB) – 4/10 – Got forward a lot and created a few half-chances, but mainly left his side in the lurch at the back.
Rabbi Matondo (RM) – 3/10 – Got into one or two impressive positions but was nowhere near good enough to genuinely threaten Bayern’s defence. A spectator for too much of the game.
Suat Serdar (CM) – 5/10 – Looked decent but was forced off injured after only 30 minutes.
Nabil Bentaleb (CM) – 4/10 – Fresh off his Newcastle loan, Bentaleb looked completely overwhelmed by the Bayern machine. In his defence, that happens to literally everyone.
Amine Harit (LM) – 5/10 – Schalke’s second-best player. Was one of very few players who actually looked like creating anything.
Gonçalo Paciência (ST) – 5/10 – Gave Bayern a few scares but ultimately didn’t have the required quality to make any real impact.
Mark Uth (ST) – 4/10 – A solid start but quickly faded away as Schalke tired and failed to give him any service.
Alessandro Schöpf – 4/10
Benito Raman – 4/10
Timo Becker – N/A
Steven Skrzybski – N/A
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